Kick Ass #6

By Mark (the fart) Miller

And John (the wrong) Romita JR.

You know what, sometimes one sticks his neck out in life and backs something or other because it is within his or her belief, and some times this opinion sees one swim against the tide of those who defend it, at times you fight for your beliefs as an army of one.

And then a while later something happens which seems to vindicate you, suddenly it was all worth while, the raised eyebrows, the looks of sheer disbelief from those, who just like all of the others, just couldn’t get past the mass brain wash, all of a sudden you can be smug and say “I told you so.

And much like my stance against Tony Stark in the Marvel Comics Civil War, I was negative toward Kick-Ass, my past views can be seen

I have just finished reading issue six of said comic, which is like a fatal car accident, you just know its going to be bad, but you still stick your neck out to have a look.

If past issues were like a car accident, then this issue is like a fucking motorway pile up as we are treated to the Origin of Big Daddy (The Dark Knight) and Hit-Girl (Robin the Girl Wonder).

The cover sorting Hit-Girl drenched in Tomato Ketchup while Big Daddy along with Kick-Ass and Red Mist stand in the background.

here

The opening to this issue sees Bat-Daddy… I mean Big Daddy shoot his daughter in the chest, she is of course wearing a Kevlar vest which stops the bullet from penetrating but it is done to illustrate the impact of the bullet so if shot on location by bad men she will be prepared for it.

Christmas consists of an M-16 from Santa for our young 10 year old.

Followed by a request for a pearl handled switch blade.

And as much Red Meat as you can eat.

Training commences with lines like…

HIT IT, BABY! HIT THIS BAG OF SHIT LIKE ITS MICHAEL FUCKING MOORE.

As we progress the training continues with more ultra violence “ what was John Woo’s 1st American Movie”

A kick to the groin “what was Clint Eastwoods birth name”

Face smashed in resulting in mass bleeding and loss of dentures and the explanation of the dictionary definition of a democrat.

Oh that easy our Hit-Girl replies

“A fucked up prick who will march for the right to murder babies, but hold candlelight vigils for serial killers”

?!?

So like the Dark Knight and Robin the Girl Wonder we can assume that these vigilantes lean to the right then, I mean don’t get me wrong, I just sort of got that impression from the subtle overtones in the text, I may however be wrong though, after all I haven’t always been the brightest spark plug in the engine.

I wont bother to tell you any more of the story as you may want to witness this carnage first hand.

I will however ask, did someone fail to mention to the writer that there has been a slight change of views in America recently?

And being as the writer is in fact Scottish then why is he spouting this kind of red neck, right wing, klu less Klux-in rubbish. (deliberate spelling mistakes)

Ah … I get it, its all a joke, you are poking fun, and its not at all supposed to be taken seriously…

Heh, you had me going there for a minute.

So as to a rating for this book, well in a car crash must have a look at the carnage, vomit inducing, pile of right wing proper gander shit, then it could score a solid 9/10 but it doesn’t quite cut the cake.

As an intelligent “see what can be achieved with the comic book medium” it’s a 0/10

As a tongue in cheek comedy in the same vein as “Springtime for Hitler in Germany” kind of way, well it could score here, but its unfortunate that its unoriginality and comparisons to Frank Millers Dark Knight are just to obvious, and its not actually that funny so that’s a 0/10

As an homage to the GW Bush era it could get a 10/10, but its written by a Scot so that don’t count.

You know what, I am so glad that I said that this comics was shit in the early days, after reading this issue I feel 100% vindicated for taking this stance. In summing up “what a crock”

Think i will go and read Old Man Logan just to remind me that Mark Miller CAN produce a bloody good comic when he wants too.